9:07 A.M. Monday morning, I'm sitting at my desk. Hardly functioning downing my regular cup of 7-11 coffee when SHE walks in. The hater. The woman who can be my friend one minute, and turn coats the next. I brace myself as I wait for her usual "Nick Nick!" good morning yell. The one that leaves me thinking "it is entirely too early to be so loud". Hours go by, and I haven't heard any of her usual rude comments about my choice to embrace my natural hair, and I think, 'maybe, just maybe she won't bother today.' WRONG. She leaves her cubicle, walks to mine and asks me how her hair looks. I say 'its okay'. What else am I supposed to say? My grandmother taught me if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. So that has been my standard answer over the months. She responds, "it's okay? That's it? I don't know why I asked you. Your hair always looks a mess!" Okay, now the gloves are off! I said' "it's fine if you think that. I didn't go natural for you, so if you don't like it, the world is still spinning." Of course she was ready with her comeback: "I know you don't care, but I just think black women should have straight hair like white women. I mean, my sister is natural and her hair is soooo soft and healthy! But it just looks a mess." I replied "well, God gave me this hair for a reason and I'm gonna rock it, and I don't care who doesn't like it. If you don't like it, don't look." Now, I tried to keep it professional, and I believe I succeeded. However, had it been outside of work, the earrings would have come off, and I would have said some things that would require me to be in church for the rest of the year to be forgiven. How many of us have been ridiculed by our boyfriends, friends, co workers, family members or even strangers who don't understand the choice to go natural? Has this ever swayed your decision, or made you consider going back to the creamy crack?? People need to learn that the natural hair "movement" (even though I don't believe it is simply a movement, or something for right now) is about more than hair. It is about embracing ourselves as a whole, and being comfortable with everything about ourselves. Personally, when I did my big chop, I cried like a baby. I thought I looked horrible, and no one would want to deal with me with only an inch of hair on my head. My boyfriend at the time kept commentin, "are you going to get your hair braided? You have enough hair for braids. You should get it braided up." But from the jump that was not an option. I wanted to rock my fro, and once I got past the bitter feelings, I came to the realization that this WAS me. Short kinky hair, anti-social to an extent, far from skinny, and somewhat insecure. But to me it was like the one thing I was taught was my crowning glory was gone, and I was naked. After this, my true self emerged. I realized I'm funny, outgoing, sweet, ambitious and BEAUTIFUL, flaws and all. So, its much deeper than hair for me. It's completion and a learning process, and accepting what everyone else says is not acceptable. What are some of your natural hair experiences? Feel free to share! -NaturallyNikki
